A Big Beautiful World Rotating Header Image

Surprised

Chicken Makhani, murgh makhani, or "Butte...

Image via Wikipedia

I did an unbelievable thing last night. Something I’m quite sure I’ve never done before. Even now, hours later, I’m still surprised by it.

I went to dinner at the home of some friends. I’d not said anything to them about being on any kind of diet. That was quite deliberate, because I don’t necessarily want people going out of their way to feed me food they think will be okay, and then having them stress that I can’t eat whatever it is they’ve been generous enough to serve me. Besides, I know these people are pretty conscious about eating healthy food, and they grow almost all their own vegetables, so I knew that even if the meal was outside my prescribed diet, it would be good for me and it would taste great. Seriously, that’s all anybody should hope for in a free meal, right?

Dinner was a superb lamb korma, served with rice, papadoms and a wonderful yogurt, cucumber and tomato mixture. I’d brought a bottle of wine which complemented it very well. I enjoyed every mouthful of the meal – and even went back for seconds, although I struggled to finish the last mouthfulls (and shouldn’t have, really). Once the plates were cleared away, my host offered his home-made Sticky Date Pudding as dessert. My tastebuds shifted from delight into heaven. I enthusiastically nodded, that yes, I’d find room to squeeze it in.

We then chatted for a while, finished off the bottle of wine and then, out of the blue, without any warning, I said, “Actually, I think I might give dessert a miss. I’m more than full from that lamb korma.” My hostess was in a similar condition so her partner was happy not to serve it, but instead save it for later.

It took me only about 5 seconds to realise what I’d done. I’d actually turned down one of my favourite desserts, from a man who is a very good cook. I’d turned down a perfectly good excuse to eat ‘bad’ food – and I felt no dreadful panic, no sudden desire to change my mind. Instead, I actually felt a little relieved, as my tummy was really quite full.

I have to tell you, I’ve never done this before. I’ve almost never voluntarily turned my back on something like that, for any reason. On the few occasions I have done it, it was entirely under sufferance, with deep reluctance, and afterwards, I obsessed on the delicious food I’d missed out on, more than likely, getting some the following day. Okay, perhaps this time I’m also obessing – but not on the food itself, but on the act of choosing NOT to eat it!

This is a good moment for me. A small chunk of optimism that I can change a behaviour that has hobbled me forever. I know once does not a habit make, but all habits start with the first instance. We’ll see how I go next time.

Enhanced by Zemanta
Share

No related posts.

4 Comments

  1. Allegra says:

    Well done! And now you can ride high on the euphoria of good food choice virtue 🙂

    1. Mackenzie says:

      Thanks! It’s amazing how good it does feel when you realise you’ve done something right without agonising over it.

  2. Eva says:

    YOU TURNED DOWN STICKY DATE PUDDING…are you CRAZY??

    Only Kidding sweetie, VERY PROUD of you and your determination and for listening to your body. Good example for me.

    Love your blog hun.
    XXXX

    1. Mackenzie says:

      Thanks. Listening to my body has always been hard because I was too deafened by the sound of swallowing more food. It’s nice to see that it does work when I pay attention.